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(Today’s post is a guest post, by my friend and reader Shannon.  When she told me her thoughts on “Valentine’s Month” as a military wife, I just knew other wives (military and non) would benefit from her perspective.  So please welcome, Shannon: wife of a military guy, mom of 3, MOPS leader.)

As a military couple, my husband and I are often faced with long periods of physical separation.  The absence and forced sexual drought for the long weeks, months, or even the years is incredibly challenging on our relationship but it can also “make the heart grow fonder” as they say.


I once heard a military chaplain give a talk to a bunch of young military wives and encourage them to send ‘suggestive photos’ of themselves to their husbands while they were away. Sure this may sound controversial or maybe even downright embarrassing, but as he went on to explain, the prevalence of naughty pictures for men to oogle is at an all time high.  

And men are very visual creatures.

While we don’t want to encourage our men to be searching for visual fulfillment outside of the marriage, we can encourage them to long for and fantasize over the wife who is waiting for them at home. Sending your husband a picture of yourself can make his heart and mind focused on you while he is separated from you, therefore building up your marriage AND helping him avoid temptation.

This doesn’t have to be advice only for military couples, as many couples go through periods of separation due to business trips or travel. It can also help turn the average day into a very exciting day for him!

Women are often too self-conscious to take pictures of themselves, but our men see us differently than that. You don’t have to be taking or sending X-rated pictures to please your man.  

In fact, sometimes the subtle sexiness is more appealing.

I once sent a picture of my bare leg in a shiny high healed shoe and it has long been a favorite. Some other ideas might be pictures of yourself fresh out of the shower wrapped only in a towel, a picture of you in a tank top and panties getting ready for bed, or how about a snap shot of your collar-bone with the caption “When you kiss me here, I melt”.

Perfecting the selfie could be a real marriage changer! –> click to tweet

These “selfies” can be anything from sweet and subtle to provocative, and everything in between! Your husband’s jaw will drop as he opens the picture and you can guarantee he will be thinking of you all day. (If you can’t fathom the idea of a picture of yourself, try laying lingerie out on the bed and snapping a picture of that. Same message with less risk.)

Just always be sure to double-check the TO line before you hit send! And don’t forget to plan to head to bed early!


Click here to find some practical tips for taking a great selfie!


A steamy idea if your husband is deployed, traveling for work, or you just want to spice up an average day. –> click to tweet